So it's been almost a year since I graduated (that and my last serious post) and I still haven't figured out what I want to do with my life, yes yes, I'm sure we all had high expectations for me and I'm sorry to have disappointed you all, but oh well.. always been thinking, thinking, more thinking (yes, my brain must be quite the wrinkled lump of gray matter by now).. get tired of thinking, try not to think, do nothing and idle.. get bored.. and start thinking a bit.. just a little bit more.. and now I'm back where I started.. mm.. consciousness.. gotta love it.. just makes you wonder if it should be us laughing at the caged chimps and not the other way around don't it? hrm.. and what have I come up with in this year of silent contemplation.. nope, not zen.. though I could probably start my own sect or religion or something if I really tried (yes, you may all call me god if you wish).. but really.. dude, where's my revelation? (yes yes, that was a horrible movie too).. but I guess it is a revelation in realizing I won't be getting any real revelations or answers that'll satisfy me till I actually stab forward blindly and do something about my life (nothing will happen till you swing the bat, to quote a horribly dubbed line from a fav anime).. so.. time to get back to thinking and here's hoping that I'll actually have the guts to do something that'll give me the push-off in life I so desperately need.. cheers to that..

P.S. and yes, for all you fans out there I still plan on writing G-Z, or F-Z, or wherever the hell I left off. would be dishonorable to break promises.. (watch out Oprah's book club cause here I come) and in case you're wondering, yes, I still have some japan fetish deep down inside of me, there's that little sword-wielding-soseki/ogai-complex-bordering-on-mishiba-seppuku-red-snow-falling-on-sexy-cherry-blossoms-otaku just itching to break out..

Labels: idle

posted by Jeff at 12:18 AM